I went to Huntsville this weekend and spent time with my sista. I was actually doing service work and working off a debt. I helped Linda work on her family tree and had a blast in the process. Wish I could have stayed in Huntsville.

I hate to say this but I came back to the chaos of my biological family and it made me cringe. I've got problems of my own. I can't handle my own stuff. How can anyone expect me to handle theirs? I just pray every day, "Lord, you know what my needs are and I pray you'll help me meet them." And that's all I can pray for others. Some things are just beyond my control. But I've got to tell you that if I weren't on medication right now, I'd be a basket case of worry.

Linda commented that in the three years she's known me this was the most peaceful she'd ever seen me. It's because I let go of all my problems and gave them to God.

Know what else? I didn't get on the computer to check my e-mail one time while I was gone. This is the first I've seen of my computer since Friday morning. There's hope for me yet.

I wanted to say something about problems though. I may be back in bankruptcy court. I've got a bad feeling that they're about to dump all my bills back in my lap. I'm hoping that isn't the case. I also have not been able to send anything to the IRS. But perhaps I can get everything caught up next month. I stretched my paycheck as far as I could stretch it. I spent some money on my classroom and now that I've heard from the other elementary school- they want their stuff back (what stuff?)- I'm glad I did because once I figure out what belongs to them what I bought will be all the materials we have.

I'm praying things settle down soon in that classroom. Chaos is something I can't tolerate any more. I just don't have the stomach for it any more.