This is the entry I sent to the on-line Al-Anon group today. I am so glad I joined this group it may save my bacon. As I told my sponsor last night, I have to pursue recovery anywhere I can find it. This maybe my ticket.


Growing up in an alcoholic home, I experienced a high degree of uncertainty in my young life. One day I would come home to open, loving arms that met my needs and allowed me to feel safe. The next day would be filled with verbal and emotional abuse. Living with these extremes, my feeling tried to keep pace. Eventually they resembled a roller-coaster ride filled with extreme highs and lows. I learned to cling to the extremes and to hold on for dear life.
When I reached Al-Anon, I slowly but surely climbed off the roller coaster and placed my emotions and my life into the hands of a Power greater than myself.
Hope for Today, p. 282.


I've been in Al-Anon for almost 4 years now. I had gotten off the emotional roller coaster but lately I've found myself back on it. I'm reacting to people and situations again. I'm also feeling like I'm responsible for everyone and everything again.

At times even though the emotional roller coaster is painful for me because it leads to obsessive thinking, I prefer it to the days when I was shut down. I hadn't thought about all of the "whys" to the situation (why do I prefer it, why am I back on it, etc) because I was so bogged down in the emotional inconsistencey that I couldn't see the forest for the trees. All I know is that I've been drowning in my feelings.

Since I've joined this group each topic you're presented has hit me where I need to be hit. Thank you for this topic because it gave me pause. I searched for a reading that I could use as a spring board and found just the one that helped me. I can't thank you enough.

I'd also like to tell all of you that the new CAL book that deals with losses is awesome. I bought one at our area assembly Saturday.