Clash of the Choirs

I wanted to say something about that last night but Linda called and I stopped typing.

Blake Shelton's choir was incredible. He came into the competition as the dark horse and made it to the final three. I have always gone for the underdog who has the talent. He did three things on Wednesday that caused me to sit up and take notice. First, the song "Home" is one that was on the recovery CD that Ellen Kelly made me two years ago. It was one of those songs that I played over and over. That CD is in the CD player of the black truck that sits on Gibson Brother's parking lot because I can not pay them what I owe and it doesn't run. Second, they chose a spiritual Christmas song to sing rather than a secular one. They were the only choir that did. Third, the song they sang was "Joy to the World". They took Three Dog Night's version and peppered it in with the spiritual one. I had just blogged about those two songs days ago. It was synchronicity. I could add in a fourth component- their coreography was simple and yet it accentuated their choice in songs. It was such a travesty that they did not win. They battled an ice storm in Oklahoma to get there.

Now - I have an analogy to make about Clash of the Choirs. Sorry. The movie title, "Clash of the Titans" just popped in my mind as I sat down. I had been thinking about Linda's visit and her attempt to mend fences between Mac and me. I guess I kind of see he and I as Titans. We're not going to be budged. I don't hate him and I pretty much forgave him but I can't go back into a friendship where I'm walking on egg shells. He's as unpredictable as Joey. He became Joey for me. I just can't go back to that. He has no idea what his words and actions did to me. In some ways his behavior hurt worse than Joey's did probably because I didn't see it coming. I saw Joey's coming before it hit. I don't even like being in the same building with Mac any more. It hurts that badly for me. It's not that I enjoy this. I really wish I could get past it but I haven't been able to. This wound just hasn't healed yet.

But I feel that there are reasons for all of this to happen. It cleared a path for me spiritually because I took my focus off worrying over his sobriety and put it on what was in front of me. It also caused me to turn back toward my biological family and mend those fences. That really does need to be done first.