My tongue will look like Swiss cheese soon. I've bit holes in it to keep from going off on Kim. But I am eventually going to become unglued on her if she does not stop talking down to me or being so condescending. I finally went to the principal about it after school. I've got my ammunition.

The sad thing is that while apologzing to me for taking advantage of my cooperative nature she told me that I was too accommodating. What? You can't have it both ways. I'm new to this system. My tenure did not transfer. I need this job, even if it does pay substantially less than the previous one. I can't afford to rock the boat. I had to cooperate and be a team player or I'd have had that held against me. Man, it's damned if I do and damned if I don't.

I talked to the deacon about it a little bit tonight. He says that all of this is one of those stumbling blocks that Satan is throwing out there because he objects to what I am about to do. Which should tell me that I'm on the right path. Right now I don't know what to think. It feels like my whole world has been turned upside down. It's like I've stepped through the looking glass and everyone has gone mad.

I see so clearly what is going on with the women in this room. I see that they are scared and unprepared to work with special needs children. They feel that they have something to prove. So they are rushing in with the controlzilla mode and failing to remember that I am still the captain of this ship. I've fought a lot of battles this year. I've fought to get aides put on the buses. I've asked about physical therapy devices. I've still not gotten all that I asked for. I've been in contact with central office and the vision therapist about switch activated devices. I've tried to get more supplies for centers, even spending money I could not afford to spend out of my own pocket. I've done my job to the best of my ability. I just don't think I can continue to work in this environment. I'd rather quit and be penniless than to have to be miserable all the time.