From: eqm@catholicdigest.com

Subject: Your Daily E-Quiet Moment

Tuesday, May 5

To reach the port of heaven, we must sail sometimes with the wind and sometimes against it, but we must sail, and not drift, nor lie at anchor.

OLIVER WENDELL HOLMES
American poet, 19th century

I love the daily readings that I receive from Catholic Digest. It gives me a short moment to pause and think about something uplifting. Today's reading goes right along with the one found on my perpetual calendar, which says:

Reach up to grasp the stars,
but never forget to enjoy
the flowers at your feet.

I think that the ordinary stars we reach for daily are opportunities (options or choices). Sometimes we have to go agaist the grain to grasp those opportunities and sometimes they just flow right in our reach.

I think it's easy to lose track of where we've been when we are moving forward. We forget about the simple joys that surround us because we're so bent on reaching for or topping the opportunity we're striving for. Maybe we get the big head or maybe we think we're entitled to all of the opportunities that come our way. Maybe we are. I don't know. I just think that some of the opportunities are given to us by the grace of God. And maybe they aren't meant to last. Maybe they're only sent to teach us something.

I hope I never forget to stop and enjoy the scenery because I may pass this way but once.

Yesterday I went down to Barry's apartment and was pleasantly surprised at how far Charlotte and Phillip had gotten in cleaning it. I don't think it's been that clean since before Barry moved into it. I'm ever so grateful for them.

I called to check on Barry yesterday and he played a practical joke on me. He came to the telephone and told me that he no longer lived there. Then he hung up. When I called back to see what was going on, I learned that he had taken something from one of his housemates and was ashamed of his behavior. I really wasn't very surprised. He took things from me all the time. Maybe this place will teach him a little more respect for other people's property.

I was telling an Al-Anon member about it last night in our meeting. She sees progress in Barry (she knows him personally). Even with this minor set back he is making progress. Yeah, I can see her point. He showed remorse.

Ever since we signed the admittance papers, I keep going over that diagnosis that I had been unaware of for him- schezophrenia/bipolar III. I had often thought that he might have either of these things due to some behaviors I saw and things he told me but to see it on paper blew my mind for some reason.

I keep thinking maybe I have something similiar wrong with me. My therapist nixed the bipolar idea. She actually doesn't think there is anything mentally wrong with me. She thinks it's all emotional. I called the clinic yesterday to see when my appointment is- I thought it was this week. I was kind of hoping it was this week. We don't have one until May 21. Bummer. By the time that rolls around I may forget all that I want to talk about. Daily so many things happen.