The topic for this week in the online Al-Anon group that I attend is "looking back". I immediately thought of a reading about how we should look back without staring. Then for some reason the song "I'll Be There" popped into my head. Do you think that when we look back we might see only the good because we are afraid to look at the bad?

Four years ago I had - a relapse, no, maybe it was more of a memory tug- at any rate, my memories were triggered by a screamer in my classroom. Suddenly all of that bad stuff came rushing to the front and I was drowning in it. No support group. Wound up in therapy but I did not work those therapy sessions with rigorous honesty. It seems to me that unless you have a support system and the courage to be honest, no amount of looking back is going to help you in recovery. But maybe I'm wrong. I often am.

Well, Mom and I went to Becky's picnic. I am always impressed with her energy and drive. She is phenomenal at what she does. I ran into people from school. Carrie was there. I wanted to introduce her to Becky because I think Carrie is interested in the Leg Up program. Nancy was also there. We all turned out to see Logan ride. It was amazing how natural he looked on the horse. Many could not believe that he was blind. Mom enjoyed herself. We both got a little too much sun.

Once I had returned her to her apartment I took a much needed nap. George called to check on me as he had not seen me in some time. I spoke to both he and his wife on the telephone at length.

Barry did not call at all yesterday. I'm surprised and a little worried about what the staff at Cedarcroft might have said to him.