Today's thought from Hazelden is:

Today I Will Trust

Today, I will stop straining to know what I don't know.
To see what I can't see.
To understand what I don't yet understand.
I will trust that being is sufficient,
And I will let go of my need to figure things out.
From: The Language of Letting Go by Melody Beattie


I used love to ask questions. I used to irritate the hell out of anyone who came around me because I asked questions. My favorite one was, "Why?" I never considered the possibility that I had control issues. Al-Anon taught me that trying to understand things is a means of gaining control.

I still have an inquisitive mind. Sometimes I slip and analyze people or situations. I learned that I made myself doing that and I've made myself stop by doing a gratitude list. I've learned to live in the question as Rainer Maria Rilke suggests. Sure, I still want to know answers but these days I look inward to find out why I react or respond to people or situations the way that I do. I no longer try to train that spot light on others. Now, I do slip ocassionally. I'm human after all.

Like today I've wondered why so many of my students were absent from school. But I did not attempt to find out information. I just enjoyed the low numbers.