I took today off because I wasn't feeling well when I got up this morning. Linda calls this practicing "HALT". I'm not so sure she knows what the acronym stands for. I think I was practicing "stop" which isn't an ancronym for anything. I just decided that I needed the rest and I stayed home.

My mother came to my rescue in the afternoon. I've got the Jewish penicilin cooking in my crock pot. She also brought me a candy bar because my sugar was low. I think I'm going to be okay. But I sure wish I had a diet Pepsi right about now. I haven't had any caffeine since Sunday. Caffeine headache hasn't set in yet but I expect it to.

The movie Rent is on tonight on FX. I just caught the opening song. It always gives me pause to think and I can't explain the feelings I have when I hear the words. I loaned my DVD of it to Linda. I've got the soundtrack on CD. It's funny how little I listen to my CDs I keep meaning to sit and just listen to the music but I don't know- something stops me from it. Maybe it's the music I hear in my head.

It's dawned on me several times today that I am off balance. I don't seem to have a grip on the things going on around me. For two days now I've taken double my dose of Celexa. I'm beginning to think the medication isn't working any more. I feel awful. Linda thinks that once I get my health back on track that things will fall back into place. I don't think so. I'm more isolated than I've ever been. I think that is what is bothering me. My health only magnifies the feeling.